Friday, April 4, 2008

Age 19

Ever since I was a child I've been told I'm beautiful, cute, even angelic. I've had more than one guy tell me I'm "perfect." I don't understand where all of these compliments come from. I have days when I look in the mirror and I see what everyone else sees; I see a beautiful young woman. I only weigh 105 lbs, that can't be fat. Right? So then why is it that I have a lot of days where I look in the mirror and despise what I see? I'm not tall (I'm only 4'11") and I don't have big breasts and a non-existent waist. I'm not what I should be. I'm not perfect at all. How dare anyone say those words to me.

For years I've struggled with an eating disorder. I don't know how to stop.