Wednesday, April 30, 2008

Age 21

Once upon a time there was a beautiful, strong, happy woman who gave birth to two beautiful baby girls. Nothing was more important to this woman than making sure her daughters knew how beautiful and how strong they were. The oldest daughter grew up to be a little more independent than her sister - she wore crazy outfits to school, loved learning, was a fierce debater and adamant feminist. The mother was so proud, and she let her daughter know every day. So much so that the daughter was afraid to tell her mother about her insecurities when the girls in school started weighing themselves and stopped eating. She didn't want to disappoint. Strong women didn't care what others thought, strong women knew that if you are beautiful on the inside the world will see that reflected on the outside. Strong women knew that beauty is not about weighing 115lbs. One day the mother and daughter were watching the news when a special came on about eating disorders in high schools. The mother looked at her daughter proudly and said, "I am so glad you are healthy, that you know better than this." The daughter squirmed inside, but smiled and scoffed at the insecure stick figures on the screen.

I am 5'7", 140 lbs and a size 8. I am beautiful, inside and out. I am a feminist who appreciates that beauty comes in every shape, color and size. I believe in knowing your own self worth and self confidence. I will never, ever tell anyone that I wish I could just lose ten pounds. That I am not the defiant, magnificent, proud person they think. I do love my body most of the time, but I do not cherish my stomach or my thighs. I hope one day I can actually be who I claim to be.