Age 23

I've always been the fat kid. Growing up, I never had a boyfriend. I still have never had a boyfriend. I was constantly made fun of. I can still remember sitting on the gym floor, watching every other kid get picked in PE. But I was always last...no one wanted me. I was never told I was beautiful, not even by my parents. I never go shopping with friends. No one else shops at the plus-size stores like me. When I walk into "normal people stores," I can feel the stares, wondering why I even walked in. I'm used to the stares, the jeers, the feeling I'm a freak. Little kids stare, their parents do nothing about it. When will I stop feeling like a freak? When will I feel beautiful? When I lose weight? When I die and am no more? When will people see the real me, the me that is just wanting to bust out in all it's wonderful glory?